Community First

As I begin my 26th year of ordained ministry, I am convinced that the primary work of our faith is to help people make, join, and thrive, in community. Healthy community is the salvation we offer. A leader’s responsibility, whether minister or lay leader, is to align the task at hand with that ultimate goal.

            Since the beginning of this church year, we’ve been reflecting on history.

            We began looking at the long ago and then more recent history of our Unitarian Universalist faith, stretching back to the beginnings in early Christianity, and even earlier in several religious concepts that continue to inform our faith.

            Then in October, we moved into our more contemporary and local history as we marked the 80th Anniversary of this congregation.  That was fun, wasn’t it?

            Telling our history, confronting our history, learning from our history, is one of the five core tasks of interim ministry.  It’s a piece of the work that the UUA recommends congregations focus on together as they move through an interim period from one settled ministry to the next.

            Our church history is related to the spiritual question of Identity, “Who are we?”.  What is our personality?  What is our congregational character?  We aren’t defined by our history.  We can be anything we want to be.  But the past has a powerful inertia.  Only if we’re aware of our past can we choose to repeat its patterns or change them

            The intention of telling our history isn’t to live there.  The past is done.  Past hurts cannot be undone nor past mistakes unmade.  The past exists in unchanging permanency, good or bad.  We can’t go back to undo.  The only action we can take is in the present.  We can choose to spend today in impotent raging against or prideful owning of what other people did, or we can embark on our own productive creation of what is yet to be.  “Where are we now?” is the question:  here, today.  Given the reality of the way the world actually is when we woke up this morning, what’s the best choice for us to do today?

            But without re-feeling the pains of the past, or imagining there’s something we could do now that would break the seal of the past, an historical perspective can be helpful in teaching lessons for today.  “Let’s not do that, again!”  We might say.  Or, “Remember what happened when we failed to be careful, or serious, or bold, or truthful, or when we focused on the wrong things?”

History lessons can be both positive:  “Here’s what worked well for us.  We were at our best when we focused on our core values, when we paid attention to the feelings of our church members and really listened” “Our church grew in membership and joy and spiritual gifts, when we sought to meet present needs rather than nurture old grievances.”  And history lessons can be negative, “that’s where we got into trouble” we might notice.  Or,  “Our past warns us to be particularly cautious and careful now as we face a similar situation and attempt to move forward into the next chapters of our story.”

            History is one of five areas of interim work.  The others are Leadership, Mission, Vision, and Connections.  We’ll work through all five during this church year.

            For this month and next I want to turn to the second of the five:  leadership.

            Leadership is an area of work for a congregation going through an interim period, because the departure of a settled minister disrupts the previous leadership team.  There may have been lay leaders who were loyal to the previous settled minister who may not feel the same compatability with the new minister.  Or they might choose to take advantage of the natural break between ministers as an opportunity to gracefully step aside.

            If the previous settled minister left amid conflict, it’s likely the lay leadership had to deal with the fallout of that.  That’s a tough situation.  Former leaders may feel burned out by different or more difficult work than they thought they signed up for.  Or perhaps they’re proud of the service they gave during a difficult time, but are now feeling they’ve done their share and it’s someone else’s turn to take over.

            In whatever fashion the previous ministry ended, it’s likely that a significant number of the former lay leaders have moved on also.  You who have been here more than a few years can name for yourselves several folks who were important leaders of this community who are no longer here.  I daresay some of the leaders who picked up the leadership job during the first stage of this transition are now feeling ready for a break.

            At the same time, the natural shift in leadership during an interim presents an opportunity.  Space is opened for new leaders to emerge.  The church is ready to try new things, to be something new.  You new potential leaders, now’s your chance!  Explore with us.  We welcome your new style, your fresh energy, your new ideas and vision.

            But these next few weeks aren’t only about church leadership!

            We are all leaders.  Leadership is about influencing and guiding.  You do it daily, officially, informally.  The qualities that make for effective leadership in a spiritual community apply also to leaders of any kind of community:  a club, a choir, a committee, a team, a classroom, a family, a business, a nation, or even, in a sense, just to be a leader of your own person.

            Leadership is a spiritual issue.  How do we healthfully, responsibly, effectively, influence and guide ourselves in our own lives, and others around us, into the future we seek?

            How do I lead myself?  How do I integrate my mind and body and spirit and the various demands and interests of my life, to move forward in healthful ways, to meet my goals, to adapt to external challenges?

            How do I lead my family?  How do I lead my circle of friends to help us all grow together in wisdom, in health, in intimacy?

            How do I lead my staff at the office?  How do I lead my students at school?  How do I lead my team on the field?

            And in those communities you care about where you’re not the one to lead, whose leadership should you support?  Who should you encourage?  What are the characteristics of good leadership that you should look for when choosing a candidate for office, or choosing our church’s next settled minister?

            Pollster Joel Benenson, who worked on Obama’s two presidential campaigns, and both Bill and Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaigns, has some advice for the candidates who want to be our nation’s next President, a leader in a big way.

            He wrote, in the New York Times last month, “From both wins and losses, I’ve learned that there are three things every candidate needs to remember: Campaigns are about big things, not small things. Campaigns are about the future, not the past. And campaigns are about the voters’ lives, not the candidate’s.”

            Benenson frames the past, just the way we’ve just been talking about the use of history.  From both wins and losses there is something to learn.  But hear also, how he frames the work of today, “Campaigns are about the future, not the past.”

            Of course that’s a warning for Trump as he ceaselessly obsesses about the last election.  But it’s a warning for the other candidates, too.  The country needs a vision of our future.  Where are we going?  Can you help get us there?

Leadership for the future, not the past, means that consoling our past hurts, or fanning our righteous anger about historical wrongs, provides temporary emotional relief, but it leaves us still exactly where we are.  Re-litigating the past doesn’t solve today’s problems.  A leader turns us from anger to hope, from old pain to new health, from the past to the future.

            Benenson’s second lesson is that candidates should focus on big things, not small things.  And to me, that relates to Benenson’s third lesson: “campaigns are about the voter’s lives, not the candidate’s.”

            Leaders focus on the lives of the community they serve:  the individual lives and the communal life.  “The voter’s lives” is the big thing a leader must focus on.  The life of the community is the “biggest thing” for any leader.  Bigger than the leader’s own needs and interests.  And bigger than the technical fixes of this or that policy or regulation or rate, is the life of the community.  How is the community?  How are we doing?  How’s our health?

            Every other big thing is a factor that makes those lives better or worse.  Even the biggest things such as climate change, or immigration, or crime or housing (and our leaders need to work on all of those things) can be measured against the single standard of the health of the community.  It is the health of the community the leader must attend to.  The health of the congregation.  The health of the nation.  The health of the family.  Every policy is a tool to make those lives better.  Every win is a win, only if it makes an actual difference in the actual lives of an actual community.

            This morning is the first Sunday of my twenty-sixth year in ministry.  This sermon is the 876th sermon I’ve preached.

            Folks often make a joking observation that every minister really has only one sermon in them.  Every sermon is just a re-statement of the one message they have to give.

            I think I have more than one message to give.  But I will say, that in twenty-five years of ministry, I have come to know one guiding principle that I think is the most important lesson of successful ministry, or successful leadership of any community.

            It’s a lesson I remind myself of when I get confused or distracted and don’t know what to do.

            The most important work of a leader is tending to the health of the community.

            Without a community there is no need for a leader.  Without health in the community, no other work can be done.  The leader’s primary job is tending to the health of the community.  

            I took a UUA sponsored training for interim ministers last year – a year-long course, we met every other week online.

            At one point early in the year, the class was talking about challenges that we were facing in the congregations we served.  A lot of our UU congregations have been in various levels of conflict recently, reflecting conflict in our broader culture, challenges because of the COVID pandemic, anxiety about national politics, stress from shifting cultural understandings around issues of race and gender identity and so on.

            One of the interim ministers asked the trainer, who was also a minister herself, how to minister to the folks in our congregations who weren’t completely on board with the progressive positions on the cultural and political issues championed by the UUA and taught to new ministers in our seminaries.

            I was disappointed in the trainer’s response.  She framed the question in terms of a UUA-wide conflict from a few years ago when a minister named Todd Eklof published a book called, “The Gadfly Papers” where Rev. Eklof pushed back on some of the UUA’s strategies for racial justice work offering both a critique and alternative strategies he suggested would be more effective.

            The trainer dismissed people who weren’t on board with the UUA’s position as “gadflys”.  She labeled the gad-flys as a disruptive element in our congregations.  And then she asked this group of ministers, how we dealt with the gad-flys in our congregations.

            I was disturbed by the cavalier manner in which a UU minister, the leader of this training, would label and disrespect members of our congregations.  It sounded like name-calling and dismissal, not an attempt to listen and understand.  It sounded like she considered these people as a problem to be managed, rather than members of a community to be ministered to.

            And then one of the student ministers made my uneasy sense even more explicit when she said, using an expletive, “Forget them, I’m moving the congregation forward and if they won’t come along we’ll leave them behind.”

            This was a young minister.  I think it was her first ministry, actually.  And I’ve had twenty-five years of experience.  So perhaps, like me, she will come to learn, that tending to the community is the number one job of a leader.

            Not leaving people behind.  Not taking part of the community off in one direction and forgetting the rest.

            Imagine a choir director saying, “if the altos can’t keep up, we’ll just leave them behind.”  Imagine a team leader at NASA saying, “if that worry-wart engineer won’t sign off on the safety of the project, we’ll just cut them from the team.”  Imagine if a member of our Emergency Response Team during this morning’s drill had seen somewhat struggling to rise with the others and left them to find their own way.

            I wondered what that new minister knew about our Universalist faith that holds that no one is entirely irredeemable.  That everyone is always, forever, held, in a single embrace.  I wondered about the principle of our faith that describes, “an interdependent web of all existence.”

            I wondered about a leader’s sense of humility.  By what justification are any of us so sure we’re right?  So certain, we have nothing to learn, convinced that a challenging voice has nothing to teach us?  Our vision is completely clear and true.  There is no weight we can’t carry without assistance?

And if we are right, because sometimes we are right, I wondered about the leader’s responsibility to teach, rather than abandon, to persuade rather than cut off?

            To be patient.  To be compassionate.  To remember the words of Marjorie Bowens-Wheatly that, “If, recognizing the interdependence of all life, we strive to build community, the strength we gather will be our salvation.” To see that diversities of all types, sensitively, respectfully, joined together, is the Beloved Community we seek.

“See the lion and the young lamb dwell together in thy home.  When we all serve one another, then our heaven is begun.  Help us bind ourselves in union, help our hands tell of our love.  With thine aid, O fount of justice, earth be fair as heav’n above.”

            In seeking heaven, the work is not to march off in heaven’s direction, accompanied by the faithful and leaving the stragglers to perdition.  Heaven is found right where we are, through the work of drawing the struggling and the sure together, and the proud, and the lost, and the lonely, and the talented, and the fearful, and the wise, and the skeptical, and every kind of human difference into one, broad, multifacted, wonderful, powerful, healthful, community.